Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Jokes on the global financial recession

A director decided to award a prize of Rs.1000 for the best idea forsaving the company money during the recession. It was won by a youngexecutive who suggested reducing the prize money to Rs. 100.

Q: With the current market turmoil, what's the easiest way to make asmall fortune?
A: Start off with a large one.

Q: What's the difference between an investment banker and a large pizza?
A: A large pizza can feed a family of four.

Q: Why have Dubai real estate agents stopped looking out of the windowin the morning?
A: Because otherwise they'd have nothing to do in the afternoon.

Q What’s the difference between a bond and a bond trader?
A. A bond matures.

Q. Did you hear Goldman Sachs has a new cafeteria?
A. It’s called the Warren buffet.

Q: What’s the Capital of Iceland?
A: About 70 cents.

A concerned customer asked his stock broker if the recent marketdecline and volatility worried him.The broker told him that he has been sleeping like a baby.“Really?!?” replied the customer.“Absolutely,” said the broker,“I sleep for about an hour, wake up, and then cry for about an hour.”

Recession Bumper Sticker- The recession is worse than a divorce. You lose half your fortune andstill have your wife.

The Difference between Communism & CapitalismIn communism we nationalize the banks and then push them tobankruptcy. In capitalism we push the bank to bankruptcy and thennationalize them.

A priest, a rabbi, and a mortgage broker were all caught in ashipwreck. Sharks were soon circling around. The sharks eat thepriest. The rabbi starts praying fervently, but to no avail, as thesharks eat him as well. The mortgage broker is really getting worried,as a shark is coming for him. But instead the shark puts him on itsback, carries him to shore, and lets him off. The mortgage brokerasks, “How come you didn’t eat me too?” And the shark replied,“Professional Courtesy!”

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Iceland is under attack !!!
REYKJAVIK
See the actual video.